


promise me we'll be alright;

by unintentionallyangsty



Series: New Asgard AU [3]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies), Thor: Ragnarok (2017) - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bittersweet Ending, Brodinsons, Brother Feels, Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Love, Brothers, Caretaking, Comfort, Comfort/Angst, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fever, Fever Dreams, Gen, Hair Washing, Heavy Angst, Hurt Loki (Marvel), Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Loki (Marvel) Has Issues, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki Gets a Hug (Marvel), Men Crying, Mild Blood, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Protective Thor (Marvel), Self-Harm, Sick Character, Sick Loki (Marvel), Sickfic, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 00:34:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26656702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unintentionallyangsty/pseuds/unintentionallyangsty
Summary: When Thor and Loki are stranded in the middle of Amsterdam due to a significantly delayed flight, Loki falls suddenly and unexpectedly ill.Left to comfort and care for his brother in an unfamiliar place, Thor does his best to coax Loki gently through his illness and, ultimately, whatever that brings along with it.can be read as a stand alone.
Relationships: Loki & Thor (Marvel)
Series: New Asgard AU [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1916323
Comments: 32
Kudos: 156





	promise me we'll be alright;

**Author's Note:**

> i'm running a bit slow on the next update for my WIP, so have some self indulgent hurt/comfort/angst to fill the gap, until then!
> 
> **story warnings !** this is a really pretty heavy piece, including graphic mentions of illness, vomiting, self-harm, and panic attacks. if this is something that bothers you, please please take care of yourself! 
> 
> this can easily be read as a stand alone fic, though there are some minor details alluding to the previous stories in the series/the details of the au. a quick overview of the au can be found at the [series summary](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1916323).  
> (again, working without a beta so all mistakes are my very own).
> 
> love you all! xx

“I can tell that you’re still cross, you know.” 

Beside him, Loki bristled, though Thor had anticipated the reaction well enough as to not be surprised by the sudden tensing of the shoulder that was pressed against his own. 

“I’m not cross.” Loki dismissed with a small sniff, a moment later, and tilted his chin up defiantly, though he continued to refuse to meet Thor’s gaze. “I only think that this is a foolish course of action. A pattern of behavior in which you, unfortunately, excel.” 

As if to prove his point, Loki reared back when the wheels of a passing stranger’s suitcase nearly rolled over his toes, and wrinkled his nose in distaste as he glared mildly after them. 

“It will be fine.” Thor reassured, nudging Loki’s shoulder with his own before settling back into his seat and allowing his eye to slide closed, the thin plastic of the chair feeling almost as if it might give out beneath him as he did so. “Stop fussing.” 

“I don’t fuss.” Loki growled, immediately shifting uncomfortably in his own seat as he eyed the surrounding noisy proceedings of the airport around them in a vaguely disgusted fashion. “I just don’t understand why you felt that all of… _this_ was necessary.” 

“If you’re referring to your alternatives--” Thor began, his eye remaining closed even as his tone took on a warning edge. 

“I just think that they were worth consideration.” Loki replied drily. “It’s not too late. We can call Stark--” 

“No.” Thor interrupted, opening his eye to narrow it slightly in Loki’s direction. “It’s too much.” 

“Define ‘too much’.” Loki repeated blandly. “Certainly nobody would even think to balk at our arriving in a somewhat unobtrusive private jet…” 

“No.” Thor repeated. “I told you. It’s too flashy.” 

“You’re a _king--_ ” 

“It’s ridiculous!” 

“Fine.” Loki agreed abruptly, taking a deep breath and visibly calming himself before continuing, “Then let me--” 

“ _Loki_.” Thor cut in. “I already told you that it’s too far.” 

“For you, maybe.” Loki muttered petulantly, folding his arms over his chest and glancing away from Thor with a sigh. 

A brief quiet settled between them, then, and Thor could not ignore the guilt he could feel beginning to pool at the base of his gut, the longer it drew on. 

“It’s not that I don’t believe you can do it.” Thor began, and shifted to lean forward again so he could rest one hand gently on Loki’s knee, a pleased smile gracing his features when Loki did not pull away. “It’s only that it’s quite a distance--” 

“I’ve travelled farther.” Loki insisted, and it was only when he rounded to meet Thor’s eyes fully that Thor was able to detect the faint hint of pleading behind his gaze. 

Thor paused, taking the moment to closely study his brother; his tensely held shoulders, and the way his hands twisted slightly together in his lap. 

He’d been keyed up since they’d awoken that morning, Thor realized with a distant start, recalling briefly how Loki been mostly silent over breakfast (which he had hardly touched, come to think of it), and had remained so throughout the ride down to the airport just outside of Tønsberg. 

At the time, Thor had simply taken it as petulance over his alternative travel suggestions being swiftly rejected. 

Now, however, Thor watched as Loki subtly shied further back into his seat as another figure hastened past, and realized that there might be more to this than he had initially anticipated. 

“I know.” he returned, when Loki had begun to look at him oddly in the growing silence. “But I do not wish you to exhaust yourself with the effort. Teleporting two people, especially, can be very taxing.” 

“How would you know?” Loki snapped, though Thor could tell by the way his gaze flickered briefly away that he was well aware of the truth behind the statement. 

They lapsed into another brief silence, then, and Thor would have been content to let the matter drop, were it not for the slightly miserable downward tilt to Loki’s mouth. 

“Hey,” Thor murmured, keeping sure to only keep his tone as loud as was needed to be heard over the bustle of the airport around them. “It’ll be alright.” 

In response, Loki’s gaze flickered briefly to the gate to their plane, before returning to settle disbelievingly on Thor. 

It occurred to Thor, then, that this, aside from the Helicarrier years before, would be Loki’s first time flying on a Midgardian aircraft. 

And, while he had insisted that Loki accompany him on this particular trip in an attempt to coax his brother out of the boundaries of New Asgard, the repercussions of such a decision were only now starting to catch up with him. 

Especially thinking back on Loki’s reluctance concerning the entire venture. 

(“I’m not quite sure why my presence is necessary.” Loki had complained the day before, as he had placed the last of his neatly folded clothing into the suitcase that sat open upon his sofa. 

“Because you’re good company?” Thor had teased from where he was perched in the doorway, laughing outright when Loki had turned to peg him with a dry expression, before sobering enough to reply, “Because you’re crown prince, and a highly valued member of the council, at that. You’ve also been at the head of the agricultural development of New Asgard since the beginning, which makes your opinion on the matter invaluable.” 

Loki had winced, slightly, his nose wrinkling as he turned his focus back to his suitcase. 

“Why not Heimdall, then?” he had inquired, at last, still pointedly avoiding Thor’s gaze. “Or the Valkyrie? They are just as knowledgeable as I on such matters.” 

“ _Because_ ,” Thor had been quick to repeat, finally breaking resolve enough to stride forward and ruffle Loki’s hair good naturedly. “I want it to be _you_.”

Following this, Loki had blinked rapidly, turning away a bit too slowly for Thor to miss it, though he had not offered further argument.

Not, that was, until their arrival to the airport, when his nerves had seemed to return tenfold).

“Truly.” Thor continued, now, when it seemed that Loki was not going to make an effort to reply. “We’ll be there before you know it.” 

“And what then?” Loki inquired and, when he finally did turn to face Thor fully, his expression was far wearier than it had been even moments before. “You really think the council will cooperate when they see who you’ve brought with you?” 

“Loki,” Thor chided, gently. “You’ve been on Midgard nearly two years, now. If nobody has outrightly objected to your presence by now…” 

“I’ve been in _New Asgard_.” Loki corrected immediately. “That hardly counts as flaunting my presence throughout the rest of Midgard, brother.” 

Thor winced slightly, though he refused to be discouraged by the words. 

“If there were a problem, we would have been approached long ago.” he reminded, “Loki, brother…This is long overdue.” 

It had been a long unspoken truth between them, that Thor had been attempting such a progression as gently prodding Loki out of the relative comfort of New Asgard for nearly the entirety of the year past. 

And now, as close as he was to success, he was hesitant to allow Loki to back out, as he had often reluctantly done in the past. 

(Especially given the fact that Thor had, after several failed attempts, finally managed to convince Stephen Strange to loosen his grip on Loki’s proverbial leash for the occasion, which was something of a miracle in itself). 

“I--” Loki cut himself off, licking his lips with a slightly furrowed brow before he turned away, yet again. 

“If you think it’s wise, who am I to stop you?” he murmured, his shoulders dropping low and defeated. 

Thor frowned. “Loki--” 

“ _We welcome you to flight 865 to Glasgow. Boarding will begin immediately, starting with our first class guests_.” a voice from the overhead speaker interrupted, and Thor did not miss the way Loki started at the sudden noise, his face paling slightly as he glanced warily up to the ceiling above. 

“That’s us.” Thor sighed, reaching to pluck his suitcase from the floor below and shooting a final glance in Loki’s direction, attempting to convey the ever familiar, _we’ll finish this conversation later_. 

“Yes,” Loki responded dimly, rising with a sigh of his own and, his brow still deeply furrowed, dutifully followed Thor as he began to stride toward the gate. 

\---

They were seated on the plane quickly enough, though what little success came with the development Thor felt was entirely undermined by the visibly mounting tension within his brother. 

Loki was sat nearly curled against the plane window, his breaths leaving him in shallow pants as he watched the multitude of guests begin to spill into the narrow aisle way of the plane, his knuckles paling as he gripped at the armrests of his seat. 

“Are there always so many people?” he snapped, and the words might have been mistaken for biting, were it not for the agitation Thor could feel practically radiating off of him. 

“I’m not sure.” Thor admitted, a little reluctantly. “I don’t normally fly through conventional means.” 

“Right.” Loki drawled. “Because only now would it be ‘too flashy’ to use one of Stark’s jets.” 

“It would have given the wrong impression.” Thor insisted, his tone taking on a warning edge. “This isn’t some Avengers mission.” 

“No,” Loki snarled, “I suppose it isn’t quite worthy of such a title.” 

Before Thor could respond, Loki was leaning forward, drawing the small backpack out from where he’d stowed it beneath the seat in front of him and rifling through it for a moment before emerging triumphantly with a small box in hand. 

“What--” Thor began, eyeing Loki with a slightly raised brow.

“The Midgardians use them for sleep.” Loki informed proudly, already tearing the box open and pouring a handful of small capsules into one open palm. “I believe, however, that their suggested doses might be insufficient.” 

“How did you even get those?” Thor inquired, watching in discomfort as Loki tossed the handful of pills into his mouth and swallowed them dry. 

“Bruce suggested them.” Loki gasped, after another convulsive swallow. “He says they’ve helped him fly comfortably, in the past.” 

“Ah,” was all Thor was able to offer in reply, though he frowned as Loki closed his eyes and leaned heavily against the far wall of the plane. 

“Wake me when we arrive.” Loki murmured, and did not bother to move again as the plane began to taxi along the runway. 

And, sure enough, Loki did fall into a somewhat restless slumber by the time the plane had taken off with a stomach-dropping lift, leaving Thor to sit restlessly, fiddling with his hands in his lap and wishing that he had been capable of offering more effective words of encouragement earlier, so that Loki might not have felt the need to drug himself to sleep in order to reach some semblance of comfort. 

“It’ll be alright, brother.” Thor murmured, for lack of anything better to do, and allowed himself to grasp onto the fabric of Loki’s sweater at the wrist between his thumb and forefinger as the plane continued to climb in altitude. 

_Two days,_ he reminded himself. 

In only two days this would be over, and Thor could return the both of them to the relative comfort of their home. 

Two days and, Norns willing, Thor would be able to convince Loki that his accompanying him would, ultimately, turn out to be a good thing. 

\---

“It’s just a trade deal.” Thor reassured under his breath the following afternoon, as Loki shifted uncomfortably beside him, long fingers tangling in the edges of his suit jacket as he straightened it for what must have been the hundredth time in the past hour. “Important for the adjustment of New Asgard, but hardly life altering. It will be fine.” 

“It _might_ be fine.” Loki replied distractedly, and glanced fitfully between Thor and the large set of glass doors they were stood before as they waited for their appointment to commence. “Thor--” 

“It _will_ be.” Thor interrupted, turning slightly to offer Loki a comforting look. “Trust me, brother.”

Loki faltered, eyeing Thor warily and gnawing at his lip with a furrowed brow. 

From inside the conference room, the sounds of the previous meeting coming to an end began to leak through the door, and Loki tensed further, his eyes snapping to the source of the noise and widening slightly as he began to wheeze for breath. 

“ _Thor--_ ” 

“This is _good_.” Thor insisted, allowing himself the small comfort of reaching out to place a steadying hand on Loki’s vaguely trembling elbow as the door before them began to slide open. 

“Everything will turn out alright.” 

\---

_‘Alright,’_ may have, in retrospect, been something of an overstatement. 

That evening, Thor paced restlessly from one end of their hotel room to the other, pointedly aware of where Loki was sat on the very edge of one of the queen sized beds, his shoulders hunched and arms wrapped tightly around his middle. 

“I cannot believe it.” Thor murmured, giving into the urge to seize one of the mugs that sat beside the coffee maker on the long table against the wall before casting it to the floor, taking little pleasure in the way it shattered into three pieces against the far wall. 

Especially when Loki jolted violently at the sudden noise, held tense as a live wire. 

“I simply can’t believe it.” 

“So you’ve said.” Loki murmured, though any sarcasm that might have colored the words was drained out by the weariness behind them. 

“To suffer such--such ill treatment.” Thor continued as if Loki had not spoken, turning again on his heel to pace back to the opposite end of the room. “And we, not having even presented our case!” 

“They seemed little concerned with the case.” Loki pointed out, unhelpfully, his mouth turning down into a severe frown when Thor rounded on him. 

“They hadn’t even heard it!” he cried. 

“They did not _care!_ ” Loki snapped, something like an ugly snarl twisting his features. “They would hear _nothing_ you had to say, and _will_ not after--after--” he trailed off and, seemingly frustrated at his own inability to continue, glanced away with a low growl. 

They hadn’t even had the chance to begin their meeting, Thor reflected with a bitter anger beginning to boil again within the space between his ribs. 

No, they had not been afforded even _that_. 

For, the second he had caught sight of Loki, trailing a respectful distance behind Thor into the conference room, the head of the agricultural team (a man named _Iverson_ , Thor remembered vaguely) had stood abruptly, his features darkening into something like a deep suspicion. 

“You did not tell me, Your Highness,” the man had begun, “The kind of company you choose to keep.” 

Admittedly, it had taken Thor a moment to catch on to the meaning behind the words, though Loki seemed to have done so immediately, if his soft intake of breath and hesitant step backward were any indication. 

“This is my brother.” Thor had begun, irritation already beginning to creep in at the edges of his consciousness, though he fought to keep it from coloring his tone. “He--” 

“We know who he is.” the man had interrupted, his eyes narrowing in an expression so openly hostile that Thor fought the urge to step protectively between him and Loki. 

“Then you know that he is the crown prince of New Asgard.” Thor had replied evenly, hastening on despite Loki’s warning hiss. “And that he deserves your respect as much as I.” 

“Is that so?” Iverson had drawled, glancing briefly over Thor’s shoulder to where Loki was still stood before he dropped it to the table and began gathering the papers spread out before him into a neat pile. “Then I believe that our business here is finished.” 

“What?” Thor had blinked. “That’s--” 

“I must admit,” Iverson had continued, still not glancing up from where he continued to gather his things. “I was enthusiastic about the opportunity to establish a trade between Anstruther and the famed New Asgard. An enviable position, certainly.” 

He had glanced up, then, his features twisting into a hollow smile. “However, I’m not certain this will continue to be the case, given some previously unknown...members of the royal line.” 

Thor had bristled, feeling the heat beginning to rise to his cheeks at the thinly veiled threat settled between them. 

“You’d be wise to reconsider your choice of words.” he had begun, taking a step forward as one hand curled into a tight fist, only to be stopped by a gentle hand at his elbow. 

“Brother.” Loki had whispered and, when Thor calmed enough to turn, met him with a pleading gaze. 

“The ah, witch has you solidly beneath his thumb, I see.” Iverson had said, though the smug expression had been wiped off his face the second Thor had rounded to face him, again. 

“Good day, Mr. Odinson.” he had muttered darkly, when he had regained his voice, before turning to exit the room, his papers tucked neatly beneath his arm. 

They had been left alone to linger listlessly in the conference room, Loki seeming to draw further back into himself, while Thor struggled to contain his rising anger. 

The containment had not lasted long, however, which left them where they were now; Thor pacing irritably as Loki watched the progression in poorly disguised apprehension. 

Realizing that he had nothing to say in reply to Loki’s statement (for he knew, even now, that there was no arguing the truth of it), Thor only growled lowly before turning and continuing to pace. 

“It was unforgivable.” he muttered, not five minutes later, his hands clenching and unclenching habitually as the bitter anger continued to course through him. 

“It was hardly unexpected.” Loki countered, keeping his eyes trained pointedly on the carpet below. 

“How can you dismiss it so?” Thor cried, turning to peg Loki with a bewildered expression and feeling more like the hot-headed warrior of his youth than he had in a long while. “After the way we were treated--” 

“Did you really expect any different?” Loki demanded, the words more heated than anything he had uttered since that morning. “ _Truly_ , Thor?” 

A thick silence settled between them, the air conditioning kicking on the only sound in the dimly lit room. 

_Yes!_ Thor wanted to cry, _Yes_ , he had. 

Had hoped, even prayed for it, at the very least. 

Yet Loki was already deflating visibly following his outburst, falling back so that his hands could grip the fabric of the thick comforter beneath him tightly, his knuckles paling with the force of it. 

“I--” Thor croaked, swallowing thickly as he struggled to find any words that might adequately rectify the situation. “I don’t--” 

“I’m going to sleep.” Loki murmured, distantly, and did not bother to do more than toe his dress shoes off and cast them aside before he turned to curl up atop the blankets of the bed, his back to Thor. 

“Loki--” Thor attempted, his heart twisting slightly when Loki did little more than curl further into himself in response. 

With a heavy sigh, Thor moved to perch onto the edge of his own bed and began to unbutton his stiff dress shirt.

When he had changed into his sleep clothes and turned out the lights, save for one dim lamp in the corner, Thor returned to the bed. 

“Sleep well, brother.” he murmured as he crawled beneath the covers, frowning slightly when Loki did not respond. “I’ll wake you before our flight tomorrow.” 

_I’m sorry._ He wanted to add, though he forced himself to remain silent, focussing on the sound of Loki’s shallow, slightly wheezing breaths for as long as he could before he succumbed to the incessant pull of slumber.

\---

Thor’s sleep was restless and fitful and, when he awoke to the sound of his alarm the following morning, he felt no better rested for it. 

He had sat up groggily, pawing wearily at the bedside table for a moment before managing to silence the incessant ringing of his mobile phone as it buzzed, before turning to the bed opposite his. 

His frown from the evening before returned full force, then, when he noted how Loki had remained curled atop the covers of his bed, still clothed in his suit from the afternoon before. 

Allotting himself as long a time as possible to prepare, Thor had showered and dressed before he had reluctantly reapproached the bed to awaken his brother. 

“Loki,” he whispered, his heart beginning to hammer within his chest when Loki did not respond beyond a faint moan. 

“Loki,” he had repeated, extending a hand to grasp tightly at Loki’s shoulder to shake it, slightly. “ _Loki_.” 

Loki had stirred awake then, blinking blearily at Thor through narrowed eyes before he turned to survey the space of the hotel room warily, as if taking it in for the first time. 

No, Thor had realized with a sickening churn of his gut, it was more like he had to remind himself of where exactly they were. 

“Loki,” he had murmured, kneeling so that he was at eye level with his still tensely sat brother. “Are you alright?”

And, after a long moment of heavy silence, Loki had nodded, not meeting Thor’s gaze as he stood and, after wavering slightly for a moment, had disappeared wordlessly into the bathroom.

The ride to the airport from the hotel had more or less continued in similar silence, Loki remaining pressed into his corner of the car as Thor had sat hunched beside him, casting tentative and unsubtle gazes at his brother’s carefully still form. 

It was only as they settled into their seats on the plane that Thor realized that something was truly wrong. 

Loki’s gaze, held sharply and apprehensive aboard their plane only two days before, was now glassy and unfocused, his breaths leaving him in unsteady rattles as he gazed listlessly at the back of the seat before him. 

“Loki,” Thor tried again, leaning forward in an attempt to catch his brother’s wayward gaze. “What’s wrong?” 

Loki tensed and, as if snapped out of some personal reverie by the words, turned to blink blearily at Thor.

“I--” he began, pursing his lips and swallowing audibly before continuing, “It’s nothing.”

He offered something like a distant, hollow mockery of a smile, though the expression quickly fell in the face of Thor’s visible apprehension. 

This time, Loki fell asleep immediately and without bothering to take any sleeping pills, his breaths heavy and labored, even over the sounds of the plane as the engines began to roar.

—

When Loki awoke as they touched down in Amsterdam for a brief layover between flights, the first thing he did was gag, eyes wide and confused, before he turned to cough wetly into his elbow, his shoulders shaking with the force of it.

Thor managed to keep himself still for all of five seconds, watching as Loki continued to tremble as he hacked, before he fell forward and began to rub his brother’s shoulders soothingly. 

“Shh,” he murmured, glancing out the window over Loki’s shoulder and noting absently that a heavy rain had begun to beat against the side of the plane. “It’s--” 

“ _Welcome to Amsterdam_.” one of the flight attendants chirped over the plane’s speakers. “ _Local time is 10:46 A.M.. Some scattered showers out there--_ ” 

Before she could finish the thought, an ominous rumble shook the plane, causing Loki to start sluggishly, his bleary gaze snapping to the window at the sound. 

“ _Make that scattered thunder showers._ ” the attendant amended, prompting a few nervous giggles from some of the surrounding passengers. 

“Thor?” Loki croaked, and Thor had to bite back a wince at how gravelly his voice came out, as well as the high spots of color on his cheeks as he finally turned away from the window to face Thor. 

“It isn’t me.” Thor defended, raising both hands innocently. 

The effect was, he had to admit, somewhat diminished by the second roll of thunder that rang out not seconds following the statement. 

Loki, for his part, only rolled his eyes wearily, one hand reaching up to rub absently at his chest, almost as if he wasn’t entirely aware that he was doing it. 

“Are you alright?” Thor inquired, at length, frowning slightly when Loki seemed to grimace. 

“Fine.” Loki snapped, irritation narrowing his eyes for all of a few beats before he deflated with a small sigh. 

“I could use another sleeping pill.” he admitted, after a moment. 

Thor blinked, though he refrained from pointing out that Loki had more or less remained asleep throughout the entirety of the previous flight. 

“Our next flight is in less than an hour.” he reminded, beginning to unbuckle his seatbelt and rising to grab both his and Loki’s bags from the overhead bin. 

If Loki noticed, he did not comment, only rose unsteadily to follow Thor into the aisleway. 

“Let’s just get settled before you fall asleep on me, again.” Thor continued, barely resisting the urge to reach back and take Loki’s hand in order to reassure himself that he was still following. 

In reply, Loki only hummed distantly, following Thor’s exit silently and keeping his gaze trained firmly on his shuffling feet. 

By the time they’d made it into the airport, Loki had begun to shiver, clenching his jaw visibly in what Thor assumed was an effort to prevent his teeth from chattering. 

With a sinking heart, Thor led the two of them to their gate, where Loki sank gratefully into the closest available chair. 

Thor hovered anxiously nearby, opting to watch as Loki curled in on himself, head immediately falling forward to rest on his arms folded atop his knees, rather than taking a seat himself. 

“Don’t fall asleep.” Thor warned, if only to fill the silence that had begun to stretch out uncomfortably. “We board in 45 minutes.” 

_Only 45 minutes_ , he repeated silently to himself in an effort to soothe his somewhat frazzled nerves, glancing first to the countdown on the screen beside their gate, then to where the rain continued to fall outside the window beyond, the wind whipping it relentlessly against the glass. 

As if on cue, a burst of lightning illuminated the length of the long window, followed almost instantly by a startling crack of thunder. 

From where he sat curled beside Thor, Loki flinched visibly, as if the sound had pained him. 

With a sigh, Thor forced his hands to relax from the fists they had curled into, and took the seat beside his brother, his knee almost immediately beginning to bounce anxiously as his gaze fell back to the clock. 

43 minutes and this would all be over. 43 minutes, and they’d be on their way back home, where Loki could get some rest and, ultimately, recover in a place of comfort. 

Only 43 minutes. 

\---

Two hours later, Thor felt like weeping in frustration as he watched the somewhat flustered looking flight attendant reach for the microphone on the wall behind her, yet again. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, I apologize for the delay.” she spoke, keeping her tone carefully neutral as a few disgruntled voices began to rise above her own. “As you know, we cannot safely board the aircraft without at least 10 minutes without a lightning strike. As it is, the conditions remain too uncertain--” 

The rest of her announcement was drowned out by a collective groan of dismay, one that Thor joined wholeheartedly, fighting the urge to simply fall forward and bury his face in his hands. 

Loki, who had done little more than cough and shift occasionally over the past few hours, stirred slightly at the noise, peeking out over his arms to survey the crowd through glassy eyes. 

“What’s wrong?” he inquired, sitting up and raising a hand to rub at the back of his neck with a wince, as if the movement had caused him great discomfort. 

Thor took a moment to study Loki before answering, noting with dismay the flush to his hollowed cheeks, and the way his hands trembled slightly where they were clenched in the fabric of his sweater at the waist, his pale knuckles a stark contrast to the dark material. 

“It’s been delayed again.” Thor informed, nodding toward where their departure information had recently updated to much later in the afternoon. 

“Oh,” Loki replied, blinking slowly at the clock as if having a hard time focussing on the numbers. “Damn.” 

“Indeed,” Thor grumbled, leaning forward so that he could plant both elbows on his knees. 

“Can’t you just…?” Loki trailed off, glancing between Thor and the rain still falling outside hopefully. 

Thor sighed, a faint sense of disappointment in himself beginning to rail at the back of his mind, again, at the inquiry. 

“You know it doesn’t work like that.” he chided, gently, trying valiantly and ultimately failing to avoid glancing at Loki’s somewhat crestfallen expression. “I might be able to do something about the rain, but the rest has to run its course.” 

“Of course.” Loki muttered, his shoulders hunching a bit further as he glanced away, again. “The ‘God of Thunder’, indeed.”

Rationally Thor knew that Loki did not mean the words; that he was simply tired and not feeling his best and lashing out at the most convenient outlet for his frustration. 

Irrationally, the jab still stung. 

Rather than pursue that particular conversation, however, Thor simply hummed in a somewhat noncommittal manner, before inquiring, “How are you feeling?” 

“Alright,” Loki dismissed quickly, only for the tail end of the word to trail off into another phlegmy series of coughs that he quickly hid behind his elbow. 

“Loki,” Thor began. 

“I’m _fine_ ,” Loki wheezed, after a moment, both looking and sounding entirely winded, now. 

“ _Loki_ ,” Thor repeated sternly. “Stop. You’re ill.” 

At the words, Loki seemed to falter, studying Thor with his mouth agape for a long moment as he continued to attempt to regain control of his breathing, before he glanced pointedly away and crossed his arms tighter across his chest. 

“I just want to go home.” he whispered, so quietly the words seemed almost reluctant. 

They were out, however, hanging on the air between them, and Thor felt his heart twist painfully at how blatantly childlike they seemed. 

“I know.” he soothed, allowing himself to reach forward to tuck one of Loki’s unruly locks behind his ear, only to frown slightly when his knuckles brushed his brother’s cheek and he felt the heat there. 

“You’re warm.” he commented, probably unnecessarily. 

Loki, however, simply blinked. 

“I don’t feel it.” he replied, and shivered slightly as if to prove his point. 

Thor felt his frown deepen, and reached out again to palm the side of Loki’s neck, his concern only mounting when Loki did not bother to bat him away. 

There was heat radiating there, yes, though it was not as bad as some of the fevers Thor could faintly recall plaguing Loki in the days of their youth. 

Certainly nothing to yet be overly concerned about, at any rate, Thor reminded himself firmly. 

“Would tea help?” he questioned, forcing himself to offer a small and comforting smile when Loki glanced at him in befuddlement. 

“What?” 

“Tea.” Thor repeated, nodding toward the few shops and cafes further down the hall from their gate. “I’m sure there’s something I can find.” 

“I--” Loki began, glancing warily between the shops and where Thor was sat, as if at a momentary loss. 

“I’d be right back.” Thor reassured, knowing that he had guessed the source of Loki’s anxiety correctly when his brother flushed slightly further and glanced away at the words. 

“I know that,” he replied tetchily, though there was little energy behind the words. “Just--” 

He trailed off, glancing uncertainly down at the toes of his sneakers and shifting so that he could tangle his hands between his knees, the thumb of one rubbing restlessly at the palm of the other. 

“Thank you.” he murmured at length, and turned to shoot Thor a small, thin lipped smile. 

“Of course.” Thor replied immediately, standing and reaching down to clasp Loki’s still hunched shoulder in a (hopefully) comforting gesture. “Anything else? Soup?” 

“Just tea.” Loki insisted without hesitation, his features twisting into something like vague discomfort at the mention of food. 

Rather than press the issue (they could have that conversation later, when Loki was feeling better), Thor simply nodded. 

“I’ll be right back.” he reminded, leaning down to press a swift kiss into Loki’s curls before he drew away and turned to head toward the shops. 

He remained pointedly aware of Loki’s gaze following him as he walked away, and had to pause to steady himself with a deep inhale as soon as he had turned the corner into the nearest cafe.

There was no reason to worry, he reminded himself as he began to scan the menu for any tea he thought that Loki might like. 

_Not yet_ , the traitorous voice at the back of his mind informed, leaving Thor with little to do but rub wearily at his face with one hand and fight the urge to curse out loud. 

\---

The rain had not abated even an hour later, and Thor had begun to consider, privately, that it might never cease. 

Beside him, Loki had cycled between snuffling halfheartedly at his airport tea, and leaning his head wearily against the back of his chair, squeezing both eyes closed and visibly willing himself to relax even slightly, only to jolt back into full alertness the second the slightest sound broke into his reprieve. 

“Not too much longer, now.” Thor soothed, for what must have been the millionth time that day. 

Loki, whose replies to Thor’s wavering attempts at conversation had become increasingly monosyllabic over the past hour, simply hummed, his eyes still shut tightly against the harsh airport fluorescents. 

Outside, another, albeit more distant, rumble of thunder sounded, and Thor felt like cursing when Loki’s face twisted into a weak grimace. 

_Damn this weather,_ he thought savagely. 

Ordinarily, a heavy rain or thunder storm would soothe him, a gentle reminder of his own minuteness, compared to that of the universe. It was humbling, and Thor more often than not welcomed it. 

Now, however, he felt undermined. Helpless in the face of something he _should_ be able to control-- 

If nothing but to offer his ailing brother some small sliver of comfort. 

_Damn this weather,_ he thought again, and reached up with one hand to rub wearily at his forehead.

The hour was nearing 6 o’clock in the evening, and Thor watched in dismay as their anticipated departure time flipped from 6:15 to 6:45. 

“Ladies and gentlemen,” another hostess, long having taken over for her exhausted predecessor, began to announce over the speakers. “I know that you are impatient to board your flight--” 

“Thor--” 

Loki’s weak moan from behind drew Thor roughly back to the present moment, and he swivelled in his chair with just enough time to watch as Loki fell forward to cradle his head gently in his hands, both thumbs coming up to rub at his temples wearily. 

“Right.” Thor nodded curtly, his mind made up, and stood in one abrupt movement. 

The airport was not the place for either of them right now, he decided firmly. 

Certainly not for Loki, at any rate. 

For all he was concerned, their flight was a lost cause. In the worst case scenario, they might miss it, and Loki could easily forge them new documentation for the next available flight back home, when he was feeling more up to such a task. 

For now, he needed a more comfortable place to rest. And this, at the very least, Thor could provide. 

If Loki noticed his rising, he did not make any indication, instead remaining curled pitifully forward, another series of coughs already beginning to wrack his frame. 

While he attempted to recover himself, Thor shed himself of his thick winter coat, extending it without a word when Loki was able to look up at him through watery eyes. 

“What--” 

“Put it on.” Thor commanded, not waiting for Loki’s answer before swooping forward to drape the jacket over his shoulders. “We’re going.” 

“Going…” Loki trailed off, glancing in confusion between the still closed gate and Thor himself. 

“It’s not time.” he croaked, at length, wincing when his voice broke off into another cough on the last word. 

“No,” Thor agreed, already reaching down to grasp at Loki’s elbow. “But we’re going. We can’t stay here.” 

He helped Loki, who was apparently too exhausted to fight it, to his feet, keeping one hand firmly on his elbow when he swayed dangerously. 

“Thor,” Loki began, clearing his throat a bit. 

“Don’t talk.” Thor warned lowly, offering one last reassuring squeeze to Loki’s arm before reluctantly letting go. “It’s alright.” 

“I can’t manage it.” Loki blurted, shame coloring his cheeks at the admission. “It’s too much, right now.” 

Thor blinked, and began to shake his head in confusion before the meaning behind Loki’s words registered. 

“Loki,” he murmured, reaching forward to tilt his brother’s chin up slightly when Loki glanced miserably down at their feet. “I’m not asking you to transport us.” 

The idea that Loki had fully expected Thor to demand such a task from him, while as obviously unwell as he was, was not a pleasant one. 

As if he believed himself to be merely a tool for Thor to utilize when he felt it convenient. 

_Do you still not trust me, brother?_ Thor wanted to say, his heart feeling near breaking at the thought. _Has it truly not been long enough?_

“Then--” Loki shook his head slightly. “I don’t--” 

“We’re just going to find somewhere to spend the night.” Thor interrupted gently, swinging his bag over his shoulder before leaning down to grab Loki’s. 

“Spend the night?” Loki repeated blankly, though he did not hesitate to follow when Thor began to make his way toward the airport exit. “But the flight--” 

“Isn’t as important as getting you somewhere more comfortable.” Thor cut in smoothly, not having to turn around to see how Loki bristled at the words. 

“This isn’t about me.” Loki retorted. “Thor, if we leave now we might never make it back.” 

“Nonsense!” Thor replied with forced cheer, and turned to shoot Loki a grin over his shoulder. “If we miss this one, you can always prepare us some additional tickets, brother.” 

Loki blinked at him. 

“I--” he paused to release a mighty sneeze into his elbow, and sniffed noisily before continuing, “I thought you did not approve of such methods.” 

“Perhaps.” Thor shrugged. “However, desperate times and all that.” 

Behind him, Loki sighed audibly, the sound more a nasally wheeze than anything. 

“I assume you won’t be talked out of this?” he inquired, moving forward so that he was able to walk at Thor’s side. 

“Nope.” Thor confirmed with another small smile. 

“And exactly how long do you plan on forcing us to stay in the middle of--” a cough. “Of Amsterdam?” 

“Until you’re feeling better.” Thor replied, at once, and nearly chuckled at the familiar irritation twisting Loki’s features at the words. 

“I’m--” Loki cut himself off with another wet sneeze, inhaled once, and proceeded to hunch over into another series of coughs. 

“Yes, ‘fine’, I know.” Thor replied grimly, and reached out to place a comforting band between Loki’s shoulder blades as he led them out of the airport and into the biting evening air.

\---

By the time their hastily called taxi cab made it to the nearest hotel, Loki was flagging visibly. 

As Thor checked them in at the front desk as quickly as possible, Loki seemed to sway slightly in place, his eyes heavy lidded as he cast his gaze around the lobby as if almost confused as to how they’d gotten there. 

“Loki?” Thor prodded, as soon as he’d secured their room, reaching out to place one hand tentatively on Loki’s shoulder when his brother did not so much as blink in response. “Brother?” 

“Hm?” Loki turned to give him a somewhat bewildered look. “What?” 

“Our room.” Thor reminded as he began to lead Loki back into the heart of the hotel, ignoring the curious look the clerk behind the counter shot them. “It’s not far. And on the first floor so you don’t have to bother with stairs.” he added somewhat proudly.

“Gracious of you.” Loki mumbled, though the sarcasm that no doubt would have ordinarily dripped from the words was as muted and halfhearted as the speaker. 

“Indeed,” Thor agreed absently, keeping one firm hand on Loki’s shoulder even as they stopped before the door to their allotted room and he fumbled to get the key to scan correctly. 

“Gallant.” Loki continued with a weary blink, when Thor succeeded a moment later and held the door open for him. “Chivalrous.” 

“You must truly be ailing if that’s the best you can come up with.” Thor informed with a wryly raised brow, though he could not deny the flutter of panic within his stomach at the concept. “Just go in.” 

Loki hummed dismissively, pausing to raise a brow of his own, only for whatever effect the expression might have had to be diminished not a moment later when he practically fell through the doorway. 

The room was not at all extravagant, Thor considered as he stepped in behind Loki and allowed the door to slide closed behind them. Two queen beds and a small, clean bathroom were really all it had to boast, beyond a small television and a couple armchairs in the corner. 

Ordinarily, Loki might have raised a fuss (if only to be contrary) at such crude offerings, taking the opportunity to remind Thor that he was a _king_ and could afford better and, even if they couldn’t, Loki could always find a way to procure them something better. 

Now, however, Loki simply crossed the room silently before all but collapsing onto one of the beds, not bothering even to toe his shoes off, this time, before curling wearily beneath the heavy coverlet. 

And, whatever optimism Thor might have been able to cling to concerning the entire situation was quickly doused by the mighty shudder Loki gave as soon as he’d otherwise stilled. 

“You should at least have some water.” he found himself saying, already crossing the room to perch on the edge of the mattress and hesitating only briefly before reaching forward to begin unlacing one of Loki’s sneakers. 

“Nn.” Loki grunted, shivering again and curling tighter when his sock clad foot was exposed to the chilled air. 

“ _Loki_ ,” Thor chided. 

“If it’ll…” Loki trailed off, as if out of breath, only to begin to cough wetly into the pillows beside him. 

Thor waited patiently for the spell to pass, and reached forward to quickly divest Loki of his second shoe before his brother had recovered himself enough to speak again. 

“Get you to leave me alone.” Loki fairly wheezed, his cheeks impossibly redder when he reemerged for air. 

“Only for now.” Thor promised with a small smile, and reached forward to grasp tightly at Loki’s shoulder for a brief moment before he rose to fetch the promised drink from the bathroom.

Upon returning, Thor’s heart sank when he found Loki curled tighter beneath his coverlet, his features pinched and brow furrowed. 

“Are you in pain?” Thor inquired, taking his seat again and extending the plastic cup he held. 

Loki swallowed and eyed the cup warily when he opened his eyes. 

“Nothing I can’t handle.” he croaked, though his hand shook badly as he accepted the proffered cup and, after making a face, sipped tentatively at its contents. 

“This is terrible.” he commented, after a moment. 

“I apologize that they did not have any fine wine available.” Thor replied drily, and accepted the cup again when Loki passed it back over with a vaguely nauseated look, only to frown down at it not seconds later. “You’ve hardly touched this.” 

“Though I did touch it.” Loki retorted, “Now you hold up...end of the deal.” 

He had already begun to sink back into the pillows below, eyes drifting shut again as if he could hardly keep them open. 

“Very well,” Thor murmured, though quite unhappily, and moved forward to place the cup on the bedside table before he rose. 

“Do you need anything else?” he inquired, hesitating and fidgeting slightly from where he was still stood at the bedside. 

“Sleep.” Loki returned at once, not bothering to open his eyes again to shoot Thor the look he no doubt would have, under any other circumstances. 

“Right,” Thor nodded once, twice, before moving to stretch out onto the bed opposite. “Sleep well, Loki.” 

He did not receive a reply, nor did he expect to. However, Thor allowed himself a glance back over to where Loki was curled, anyway, and felt himself frown at the unsteady rise and fall of his brother’s shoulders. 

The hour was not yet 7 P.M., and Thor, not normally one early to bed, found himself restless. 

He poked at his phone for a while, replying with some difficulty to a few texts from the Valkyrie (mainly a response to her indignance toward the airline for delaying their return so significantly) and managing to scroll through a bit of news before he cast it aside with a sigh. 

The clock on the bedside table read 7:16pm and, beside that, Loki slept on. 

Thor had not brought a book to entertain himself with, he considered, his mind preoccupied as it had been with the success of the upcoming meeting. And any books Loki had brought were more likely than not stored wherever he kept his various other “odds and ends”. 

Certainly not on this realm, at any rate, though Thor doubted that he would have particularly enjoyed any of the books Loki chose to entertain himself with. 

Ultimately, Thor settled on clicking the small television on and, before Loki could so much as stir, lowering the volume almost entirely. 

He scrolled listlessly until he found a Midgardian film he did not recognize (rare, these days, given both Loki and Val’s fondness for television and the particular wealth of them called “Netflix”), and settled in to watch and understand as much as he could with the lowered volume. 

7:42 the clock read, and yet Loki did not so much as shift, leaving Thor to sigh before making himself more comfortable beneath his own blankets, his gaze alternating between the screen and his brother’s still form. 

\---

At 9:15 P.M. exactly, the sound of Loki muttering beneath his breath drew Thor roughly from the light doze he’d managed to slip into, the television still flickering quietly on the table before them. 

“Loki?” he hissed, entirely alert as he sat bolt upright, then, his heart hammering in his chest as Loki shifted, his murmuring beginning to increase in volume. 

“Loki,” Thor repeated, rising and crossing the space between the beds in two quick strides. 

“Nn.” Loki shifted again, the sheets twisting around his legs as he turned to face Thor, now. 

His features were drawn, his breaths leaving him in short pants from between his just barely parted lips. 

“No,” he whispered, his hands tangled in the comforter clenching so tightly his knuckles paled with the force of it. “Don’t--don’t touch--” 

“Loki,” Thor breathed, falling forward so that he was knelt by the bed. He did not allow himself to reach out yet, however, well aware of how jarring Loki was apt to find sudden touch, when in the throes of an unpleasant dream. “It’s only a dream, brother. You’re alright.” 

“Don’t touch me!” Loki snapped, though Thor had not so much as moved, and began to thrash weakly beneath the covers. “I’m--of Asgard--” 

He broke off, then, into a series of harsh sounding coughs that sounded as if they were being ripped from somewhere deep within him, his cheeks tinging a bright and unhealthy pink as his breath whooped. 

“Loki!” Thor cried, alarmed, and allowed himself to fall forward to rest a gentle hand on Loki’s jerking shoulder. “ _Breathe_.” 

Ever intent on doing the opposite of what was commanded, however, Loki’s coughing only increased, becoming so violent he could scarcely draw breath between each. 

“Loki,” Thor repeated, a hot prickling beginning behind his eye as he watched his brother continue to struggle for air. “Please breathe. _Please_.” 

Thor was a little unsure of whether the last plea had been to Loki or to whatever deity might be watching their plight, though it was not seconds before Loki released one final hack before inhaling a deep, unsteady breath. 

“Yes!” Thor cried, running the hand still on Loki’s shoulder soothingly up and down his trembling arm. “Yes, Loki!” 

The celebration did not last long, however. For, not a moment later, Loki’s eyes flew open, his expression vaguely panicked, and he gagged audibly. 

With only seconds to realize what was happening, Thor dove for the small waste basket beside the bed, bringing it between them with just enough time for Loki to lean forward and begin retching into it. 

“There,” Thor soothed, reaching out with the hand not holding the trashcan to gather Loki’s hair behind his head, his heart leaping at the heat he could feel radiating off of the skin there. “Shh. It’s alright.” 

Loki merely gagged again before continuing to retch, bringing up what little water he had managed to take in, earlier. 

The thought left Thor a little panicked, though he fought not to show it as Loki finally began to quiet, his unsteady breaths echoing in the plastic of the trashcan as he continued to pant. 

“It’s alright.” Thor repeated, placing the basket as far away as he could reach (Loki had always detested being brought low enough to vomit) when he was certain that it was safe to do so, before returning his hand to its previous position on Loki’s arm. “It’ll be alright.” 

Seemingly unhearing, Loki simply swallowed audibly, once, before falling back against the pillows, his dark hair a stark contrast to the pressed fabric, and shuddering violently. 

“Here,” Thor murmured, reaching out for the cup on the table and bringing it to his brother’s minutely trembling lips. 

Whether automatically or simply because he was too tired to argue, Loki obediently swallowed a few sips of the proffered drink before he went limp, his breaths beginning to even slowly out into a weak semblance of sleep. 

Somewhat shaken himself, Thor fell back on his heels, just barely having the presence of mind enough to return the cup of water to its place on the bedside table before he buried his face in his hands. 

“Oh, Loki.” he whispered, the all too familiar feeling of helplessness beginning to bubble up between his ribs before he could quell the sensation. 

How long had it been since he had seen Loki like this? Certainly not during or since their time on the _Statesman_. 

Surely, there had been the occasional cough or spell of malaise, though Loki had waved those off immediately and, when he could not, was typically successful in hiding them from almost all concerned parties. 

It hadn’t been since before the Bifrost, Thor considered, that Loki had been so ill. 

Or, rather, he mentally amended, since he had personally seen Loki so ill. 

And even then, they had had the healing rooms upon Asgard. They had had Eir, a team of highly capable healers and mages, and even their _mother_ to help and heal and soothe. 

It was at the thought that Thor realized how truly and pitifully underprepared he was, in the face of such circumstances. 

An idea struck him, then, and he lurched to his feet, allowing his hand to fall from Loki’s arm as he practically dove for where his phone still lay discarded on the other bed. 

Only to hesitate, one hand hovering over the device as his gaze flickered back over Loki’s still form. 

As disinclined as he was to leave his brother alone, Thor knew rationally that waking Loki from his hard won sleep was a less desirable alternative. 

And, he considered, it was rare indeed for one of Loki’s nightmares to be so quickly followed by another. 

( _When he is not boiling with fever,_ Thor thought dismally, though he quickly shook the reminder away, for it brought a sick sort of panic up the back of his throat like bile). 

His mind made up, Thor pocketed the phone and swooped forward to press a brief kiss to the top of Loki’s head, frowning slightly as the heat of the fever pressed back against his touch. 

“I’ll be back.” he whispered, though he knew he would not receive a reply, and, with a final look cast briefly over his shoulder, exited the room. 

Outside in the hallway, Thor toed off one of his sneakers and placed it between the door and its frame to ensure that he was not locked out of the room entirely, before he retrieved his phone and quickly keyed in the familiar number. 

The line had rung nearly four times before Thor began to grow nervous, a cold sweat breaking out at the base of his neck as he considered what his alternatives might be if--

The other end of the line crackled, and there was a soft ‘ _shit!_ ’ before a more audible, “Thor? Hello?”

Thor released a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding, his eye falling closed as he fairly collapsed against the far wall of the hallway. 

“Thor?” Bruce repeated, his tone a bit more uncertain, now. “Everything okay?” 

“Bruce.” Thor breathed. “Thank the Norns.” 

“Thor? What’s wrong?” Bruce demanded, a distant clatter ringing in the background, followed by another soft, “Shit.” 

“Nothing, I--” Thor cut himself off, taking another small breath and willing his scattered thoughts back into some semblance of order. “I apologize. Did I wake you?” He realized, belatedly, that he had no idea what time it would be in the States, at the moment. 

“No,” Bruce huffed a small laugh. “I’m just in the lab with Tony. Say hi, Tony.” 

“Hey, Point Break!” the greeting came from further away, and Thor could not help the small smile on his face, short lived as it was. 

“Give Anthony my regards.” he offered distractedly, his gaze already flickering back to the propped open door opposite him. 

“He’s grinning.” Bruce informed. “Everything okay? You sound distracted.” 

“It’s--” Thor began, pausing briefly and gnawing at the inside of his cheek before continuing, “It’s about Loki.” 

“L--” Bruce cut himself off, and there was another sound, followed by what sounded like a muffled departure, and when Bruce spoke again it was from a much quieter setting. 

“Thor, hello? What’s up with Loki?” 

“He’s ill.” Thor filled in. And, as if a dam had been broken, the following words began to spill forth from him almost against his own volition. “He seemed worn yesterday--drawn. He awoke this morning confused and distant and, after our first flight, had begun coughing and showing symptoms of fever. I don’t--” 

“Wait, hold on. Slow down.” Bruce instructed, and Thor could practically see the way he would be rubbing at the bridge of his nose as he took in the information. “Your flight to Scotland?” 

“From,” Thor corrected absently, a bit of guilt registering when he realized that he had not kept Bruce updated about their trip, as he had previously promised. 

“Right,” Bruce replied. “How’d it go? The meeting?” 

Thor grimaced. “Not well.” 

“Ah,” Bruce coughed a little awkwardly, before quickly moving to the next subject. “Um--So you said he has a fever?” 

“And a cough.” Thor confirmed, nodding, though Bruce could not see him. 

“Is that all?” Bruce prodded, “Any confusion? Body aches or nausea?” 

Thor bit back a wince, realizing with a prickle of shame that he had not thought to monitor Loki’s pain he might not be able to see. 

“He vomited once.” he hastened on, “Though I feel it was more from the force of his coughing, than anything else. He--he also had a nightmare, though that is not uncommon.” 

The last bit he offered reluctantly, still timid as he was about offering too much information about Loki to anyone. 

Though he considered that, as Bruce had shared their chambers aboard the _Statesman_ , he likely was more familiar with Loki’s nightmares than almost any other. 

“Right, right.” Bruce was saying, more likely than not nodding and beginning to pace. “Has he complained about pain? I assume he has a headache. Any side or muscle pain?” 

“He has not complained.” Thor admitted, “Though he can be...private, about these things.” 

“Right.” Bruce repeated. “Okay. Do you have any ibuprofen? Or tylenol?” 

Thor paused to think, running a quick mental list of the items he had packed, as well as what he knew about Loki’s luggage. 

He thought briefly, then, of the sleeping pills Loki had eagerly knocked back during their first flight, and wondered what other medicinal supplies his brother might have brought along. 

“I’m not sure.” he admitted, at length. 

“Okay,” Bruce exhaled a slow breath. “I’m not sure exactly how it works with you guys or--or him, I guess. If pain meds would even help, I mean. But if you have them, try giving him at least four or five.” 

Thor thought again of the handful of pills in Loki’s hand on the plane, and nodded before hastily tacking on a verbal agreement. 

“Keep him hydrated.” Bruce continued, “Water, or gatorade if he’ll take it. He’ll be drained and dehydrated from the vomiting and sweating out his fever.” 

He paused, then, “I don’t think a thermometer would tell you anything I’d understand,” he muttered, after a moment. “But if the fever gets high, like, you can’t touch him without almost being burned, then get him into a cool bath or shower. Not cold, just cool.” 

Thor nodded, again, his head beginning to swim with the over excess of information, coupled with the worry he could feel churning within his gut. “Alright.” 

“Call if you have any more questions or if he gets worse.” Bruce was saying. “And Thor?”

“Yes?” Thor allowed his eye to slide briefly closed as he fought to control his breathing. 

“He’ll be okay.” Bruce offered, and Thor could practically hear the comforting smile behind his words. 

With a shaky inhale, Thor nodded, biting down on his lip and blinking rapidly for a long moment. 

“I thank you, Bruce.” 

“No need.” Bruce dismissed. “Just keep me updated, okay?” 

“I will,” Thor promised, before reluctantly ending the call. 

After a moment, his gaze fell again on the door opposite, the stretch of hallway between himself and it seeming suddenly infinite as he fought to gather himself. 

Bruce’s instructions ringing out on repeat through his mind, Thor allowed himself one final sigh before he pushed off of the wall he was leaned against and, after a brief moment of hesitation, crossed to enter their room again. 

To Thor’s relief, Loki was still sleeping, curled atop his bed with his face half-buried in his pillows, when he returned. 

And, though his breaths were little more than shallow and rattling, he did not seem to be dreaming or thrashing, which was something of a blessing. 

Thor allowed himself another moment to simply survey Loki’s uneasy sleep, before he turned and reached for Loki’s backpack where it was lying beside their additional luggage. 

He swallowed back the guilt he could feel beginning to prick at the back of his mind as he unzipped the bag. Loki was notoriously private, at best, and did not take well to anyone, even Thor, going through his things without explicit permission. 

Satisfied in the overall gravity of their current situation, however, Thor pushed the feelings aside and began to rifle through the contents of the bag. 

To his surprise, he unearthed a small plastic first-aid kit almost at once and, in spite of himself, huffed a laugh, struck suddenly by the memory of a much younger Loki, insisting upon bringing bandages and various tonics along on their ventures back on Asgard, for times when his magic might not be enough to heal a wound or further affliction. 

Some things would never change, it seemed. 

Thor fought for a moment to open the kit, his large fingers fumbling briefly with the small plastic clasp, and felt a bit of relief sooth his aching chest when he saw the contents. 

The inside of the kit was well stocked (and really, with Loki, who could expect anything else?) with bandages, various medicines and tonics, as well as a handful of herbs Thor would no doubt require his brother’s assistance to identify. 

Picking through the items, Thor successfully found a small bottle labelled “Ibuprofen” and, recognizing the name, eagerly dumped a handful of the capsules into his palm before snapping the kit shut and tossing it hastily aside. 

He turned, then, and eyed what he could see of Loki’s form on the bed warily. 

As hesitant as he was to disrupt his brother’s fragile sleep, Thor knew, rationally, that having Loki take the medicine now, rather than later, would ultimately benefit them in the long run. 

The thought firmly in mind, Thor stood and crossed the room, only to kneel again at Loki’s side with a small and sympathetic smile already on his face. 

“Loki,” he whispered, reaching distractedly out to grasp the cup of water in one hand and shaking Loki’s arm gently with the other. “I need you to wake just for a moment.” 

Loki’s sleep, it seemed, was as tremulous as it had first appeared. For, not seconds after Thor’s hand had landed upon his arm, his eyes fluttered open, and he glanced blearily about the room before his gaze landed on Thor. 

“I just need you to take these.” Thor informed, extending the handful of pills for Loki to examine. 

He knew well, after all, that forcing any medication onto Loki that he had not fully identified and consented to would end in a situation _far_ worse than this. 

“It’s just a painkiller.” Thor continued hastily, when Loki simply blinked uncomprehendingly at the proffered medicine. “It’ll help with the fever.” 

Loki blinked again, and his mouth began to twist into a small frown, only to break off into a grimace as one hand rose to rub at his temple. 

“Loki?” Thor cried, rising to place his hand over Loki’s own where it was pressed tightly to the side of his head. “Are you hurt?” 

It seemed, briefly, that Loki was ready to protest. Instead, his expression crumpled, and he fell forward to brace one elbow on the edge of the bed, a low whimper escaping his lips as he curled forward. 

“Please,” Thor pleaded, the hand holding the pills shaking slightly as he extended it again. “This will help, I promise.” 

Loki whined again, the sound low in his throat, and shifted just enough to eye Thor’s offering consideringly for a long moment, before he extended a trembling hand of his own to seize the pills and, seemingly to get the action over with as quickly as possible, tossed them into his mouth and screwed his eyes closed. 

Before he could swallow them dry, Thor surged forward and pressed the edge of the plastic cup to Loki’s mouth, who sipped gratefully before shuddering mightily, his features twisting into a grimace as he swallowed, again. 

“That’s it.” Thor soothed, the hand now free of the pills reaching down to grip tightly at Loki’s still trembling hand. “Well done.” 

“Thor,” Loki all but whimpered, something like misery creasing his features as he swayed dangerously. 

“Shh.” Thor moved his hand to stroke soothingly at Loki’s arm and shoulder, willing a small and (hopefully) comforting smile onto his face. “It’ll be alright.” 

Loki only continued to watch him expectantly for a long moment, his brow creased as he seemed to struggle to piece the situation together. 

Thor held his breath, allowing himself to be scrutinized for another moment longer, before Loki faltered, his gaze flittering away as he quickly raised an elbow to cough into it. 

Thor rose quickly, wrapping his arm around Loki’s shoulders and tugging him close so that his forehead was pressed to Thor’s shoulder. 

“There,” Thor murmured over the sound of coughing, and turned to press a long kiss to the side of Loki’s head. “Shh.” 

Eventually, Loki quieted, his coughing tapering off first into uneasy breaths, then into longer, uneven snores, mucus rattling noisily at the back of his throat as he fell limp into Thor’s hold. 

“There,” Thor repeated, placing another kiss into Loki’s curls before drawing away to lower his brother back onto the mattress. 

He took another moment to draw the thick comforter back over Loki’s shoulders, followed by his previously discarded jacket, and gently tucked one of his brother’s curls behind his ear before moving back toward his own bed. 

The clock beside the bed read 10:02 P.M. now, and Thor could feel his own eyes beginning to droop heavily. 

With another glance toward where Loki continued to sleep, Thor curled beneath his comforter and allowed his eye to drift closed, praying to whoever might be listening that the rest of their night might go undisturbed. 

\---

An indeterminable amount of time later, Thor stirred back into wakefulness, though he couldn’t tell exactly what had awoken him. 

He blinked blearily and cast his gaze around the now entirely dark room, eye squinting in confusion when he couldn’t hear anything beyond the gentle rain against the window, and the radiator rattling in the corner beneath. 

He turned to face the opposite bed, then, his gaze falling automatically to where Loki had last been laid out, when he’d fallen asleep, only to feel his heart lurch sickeningly when he found the spot to be empty. 

With a sharp inhale, Thor sat fully upright, his gaze beginning to frantically flicker over the room even as his vision continued to adjust to the darkness. 

Had Loki gotten worse? And wandered out to seek out some medicine or comfort for himself that he could not find within the room?

Had he begun to sleepwalk in the throes of another nightmare and managed to unlock the hotel room door? 

Or had he somehow managed to teleport himself out in his feverish state of mind? And was now wandering the streets of Amsterdam, lost and confused and chilled--

Thor inhaled another breath, squeezing his eye briefly closed and willing himself to remain calm. 

Panicking would hardly help the situation, after all. 

With a quick huff of an exhale, Thor stood abruptly, preparing himself to check the bathroom first--

Only for his gaze to fall on the corner of the opposite bed, where Loki was currently perched, his back to Thor and his elbows planted on his knees. 

Now that he had awoken fully, Thor could just barely make out his brother’s shallow and harsh gasps echoing throughout the room as he sat, rocking back and forward ever so slightly. 

Hesitant to startle Loki, Thor did not speak just yet, and instead took a tentative step forward, one arm already outstretched to either comfort or restrain;

Whichever came first, he thought bleakly. 

He stumbled to a halt, however, as Loki began to murmur something beneath his breath, another beat of silence passing before a few words began to grow identifiable. 

“Running--” Loki breathed, rocking forward so violently Thor feared he might pitch off the bed entirely. “They--they--” 

His voice was harsh and tinged with something close to panic, and Thor felt his own stomach drop in fear as he listened to it. 

“Loki?” he inquired, taking another step toward the hunched figure. “Are you alright?” 

“Bugs.” Loki whispered, tensing suddenly, tight as a bowstring, and whirling to face where Thor was approaching. “Insects. _Creatures_.” 

“What?” Thor blinked. Whatever he had been anticipating, it hadn’t been that. 

“Bugs,” Loki repeated fervently, leaning closer as if sharing a particularly significant secret, even as his gaze skittered away. “They’re here.” 

“I--I don’t understand.” Thor admitted, taking advantage of the moment of distraction to take another step closer. “Who--”

“They’re here!” Loki cried, his voice rising in pitch as he turned to meet Thor’s gaze, again, his own wide and detached, before something like a dim terror dawned behind his eyes. 

“He’s here.” 

“No, Loki!” Thor cried, abandoning all pretenses of caution and lurching forward to grasp both of Loki’s tense shoulders beneath his hands. 

He recognized (even if he still failed to fully understand) the familiar pattern behind the words, and was determined to cut that particular train of thought off before Loki could work himself into a panic. 

“He’s not.” Thor soothed a little frantically, his thumbs beginning to rub circles in the tense muscles beneath his hands. “You’re safe, Loki. No one else is here. You’re _safe_.” 

“He--” Loki choked a bit, hacking out a series of coughs into his shoulder, the muscles spasming violently beneath Thor’s grip. 

“Loki--” 

“He is!” Loki snapped, beginning to tug weakly back out of Thor’s hold. “And he--there are--” 

He inhaled a sharp breath, then, and whatever color in his face drained as his eyes widened dramatically. 

“ _Bugs_.” 

Before Thor could react, Loki tore himself from beneath his grip, balancing unsteadily on the very edge of the mattress as his own shaking hands rose and began to shove the sleeves of his sweater up to his elbows. 

“Loki--” Thor began, his heart beginning to race in alarm as he watched Loki begin to rub fretfully at one forearm with the heel of his palm. 

“They’re--” Loki cut himself off with a weak gasp, hardly hesitating before he began to scratch violently at the skin of his arm. “They--” 

Almost immediately, blood began to bubble up beneath the quick work of Loki’s fingernails, though his expression did not so much as shift. 

Almost as if he expected it, Thor realized distantly--

Almost as if he had achieved a similar outcome in the past. 

“No!” Thor cried, falling clumsily forward to wrap both arms around Loki’s now trembling shoulders. 

“They’re under my skin!” Loki all but shrieked, shifting his attention to begin scratching at the opposite, as yet unharmed forearm. “They’re moving and _crawling_ and--” 

“It’s not real.” Thor reassured, alarm causing his heart to leap to his throat as he noted the blood beginning to streak the other arm, now. “Loki, it’s not _real_.” 

Before he could even realize the urge to do so, Thor felt hot tears beginning to streak down his cheek, and he allowed his head to fall forward so that his brow was rested against Loki’s still jerking shoulder, his tears falling to the sheets below in tandem with Loki’s now slowly dripping blood. 

“They won’t get out.” Loki gasped, his breaths fast and hot against the crown of Thor’s head. “They--I can’t get out. I--” 

“Shh,” Thor surged forward, then, and easily plucked both of Loki’s wrists into the tight grip of one hand. “It’s not real.” 

“I--” Loki choked, again, blinking frantically as he began to thrash against the hold. “I--No!” 

He jerked back, his elbow nearly striking Thor’s nose as he fought the hold around his shoulders, his right hand curling into something clawlike as the nails began to tear again at the skin of his left wrist, drawing blood almost immediately. “Stop--”

“Loki,” Thor all but sobbed, his grip around Loki’s wrists tightening as far as he could go without causing pain. “Please.” 

_Please_ , he silently prayed. _Please_. 

“Let me--” Loki sounded breathless, now, his struggles growing rapidly weaker beneath Thor’s hold. “Let--” 

“Lo,” Thor whispered, adapting a nickname he had not used since before even their tweens, and felt more than saw his brother tense at the gentle murmur. “Please. Please stop.” 

Loki hesitated, fighting for another brief moment, before he dissolved into a series of weak sobs, all but collapsing against Thor, who tightened his hold almost immediately.

“Shhh,” Thor repeated, reaching up to run his hand soothingly through Loki’s sweat drenched curls. “You’re alright.” 

If anything, Loki’s distress only grew, and he let out something like a muted wail as he curled forward, his forehead nearly touching his knees, now. 

Beneath his grip, Thor could feel the heat radiating off of Loki’s shoulders and neck, and his heart leapt mightily at the sensation. 

He wasn’t sure how long it had been since he’d administered the medicine, he realized, nor how long it should have been before he offered more. 

And, he considered, his gut turning unpleasantly, he wasn’t sure if Loki would take well to enforced medication, in his current state. 

“It’s alright.” Thor repeated, for lack of anything better to say, and continued to stroke his faintly shaking hand through Loki’s hair. “It’ll be okay.” 

Loki released another weak sob and, before Thor could register what was happening, curled slightly closer, his nose tucking into the space between Thor’s neck and shoulder and nuzzling softly. 

“I’m sorry.” Thor hiccuped, tightening his grip on the back of Loki’s head and rocking the two of them ever so slightly. “I’m so sorry.” 

Loki did not reply, nor did Thor expect him to. He simply tightened his hold and pressed a long kiss to the side of his brother’s head, his eye slipping shut as he prayed fervently for peace and healing to whoever might be listening. 

Eventually, Loki relaxed minutely further, his shoulders still trembling faintly beneath Thor’s arm as he alternated between sniffling and coughing weakly. 

The skin beneath his touch was still uncomfortably warm, Thor considered, and he watched, his stomach turning again, as the wounds on Loki’s arms continued to bleed sluggishly, the deeper wounds welling slowly and dripping onto the sheets below. 

His mind made up as to the only logical next step, Thor sighed softly, and pressed another soft kiss to Loki’s head before he drew back slightly. 

“Loki,” he whispered, at length, not at all liking the way Loki’s gaze remained vacant and carefully averted from his. “We need to bring your fever down.” 

Loki did not reply beyond a small frown, his knees drawing up almost as if on their own volition to tuck tightly against his rattling chest. 

“Do you trust me?” Thor murmured, drawing further back enough to meet Loki’s gaze and, when it continued to skitter frantically about the room, raising one hand to trail his thumb gently along Loki’s sharp cheekbone. 

“Loki?” he prodded, offering a small smile when Loki’s wide and red-rimmed eyes finally found his. 

There was a beat, before Loki nodded jerkily, once, and Thor felt something within him loosen slightly at the acknowledgment. 

“Alright,” he allowed himself a nod, before offering Loki a slightly warmer smile and repeating, “Alright. I--Would you be alright with a bath?” 

Loki seemed to hesitate, then, his eyes falling as he curled slightly in on himself, biting his lip as if carefully considering the words. 

Or, Thor thought, trying to make sense of them. 

Finally, after what seemed like a lifetime, Loki nodded again, his brows furrowed but his mouth downturned into a determined frown. 

It was a blatant display of trust, Thor realized with a start, and one he did not intend to take lightly. 

“Alright,” he said again, feeling comfortable enough now to hesitantly loosen his grip around Loki’s wrists, and instead moving to place a hand beneath either of his still slightly shaking elbows. “Can you stand?” 

Immediately, Loki nodded, though Thor knew better than to be fooled entirely by the quick dismissal. 

Unsurprisingly, even while ill Loki had some semblance of mind to maintain even a small shred of his damned pride. 

Therefore, Thor remained close as his brother made to stand, his hands hovering just beneath Loki’s elbows as he swayed dangerously. 

Somehow, they made it to the bathroom without Thor having to take any of his brother’s weight, though they did pause twice on the way, while Loki reached a hand out to brace himself against the nearest wall, his features waxen and drained of all color as he fought to catch his breath. 

And, when they finally did make it to the bathroom, Loki all but collapsed onto the edge of the bathtub, sweat beading at his pale temples as his eyes began to flutter closed. 

“Not yet,” Thor warned gently, already moving forward to help divest Loki of his now sweat-damp sweater with a hastily whispered promise of, “Just a bit longer.” 

Miraculously, Loki sat still and pliant, and allowed Thor to help him out of the rest of his clothing with no complaint. 

And, ordinarily, Thor would have been relieved at the lack of argument, were it not for the chill of discomfort he could feel beginning to worm its way into the pit of his stomach at the way Loki immediately stilled beneath his touch, a strange disconnect taking up residence behind his eyes as he failed to react beyond the occasional, automatic lift of an arm or a leg to help speed Thor’s work. 

Once settled into the cool water of the rapidly filling bath, however, Loki seemed to come slightly back into himself, and he blinked blearily as his shoulders relaxed a bit beneath Thor’s guiding touch. 

“This’ll help, I promise.” Thor soothed and, unsure of what else he should be doing with his hands, began to gently splash the cooled water at the sweat still clinging to Loki's shoulders and collarbones. “Bruce said it would.” 

Thor was unsure of whether or not the words registered to Loki, though he noted with some relief that he did not tense at all as Thor continued to work. 

(He tried valiantly to ignore the way the water had turned slightly pink as the wounds on Loki’s forearms soaked, though he could not deny the nauseating flip his stomach gave at the sight). 

There were a few long minutes of silence, then, the only sound the still running tap as Loki all but melted against the back wall of the shower, his eyes listing closed as his head lolled lazily. 

Thor bit his lip as he tried and, ultimately, failed to find something with which to occupy his frazzled attention, his hands clenching and unclenching at his sides as the water slowly neared the top of the tub. 

His eyes settled, then, on the variety of bottles perched on the edge of the bath, and an idea, born of an almost long forgotten instinct, began to form at the back of his mind.

“Loki?” he inquired, one restless hand already plucking up one of the small bottles. 

Loki stirred slightly, his eyes opening a crack to peg Thor with a somewhat weary gaze, though he remained resolutely silent. 

“I only thought--” Thor broke off, then, coughing a little awkwardly before he steeled himself and reached out with one hand to tangle his fingers at the very ends of Loki’s now damp curls, not missing the way his brother’s eyes followed his movements carefully. 

“It might make you feel better.” Thor murmured a little lamely, at last, and offered a small smile as he brandished the shampoo bottle in his hand and tugged gently at Loki’s hair, as he had done hundreds of times in their youth. 

Something in Loki’s expression cleared slightly at the familiar gesture, and he glanced away with a small hum, something almost like a ghost of a smile quirking at the corner of his mouth as he nodded once. 

In return, Thor beamed, and took a moment to tie his hair back into a small ponytail before he leaned forward to scoop a small handful of the cool water into his hands, and lifted it to run gently over Loki’s head. 

To his surprise and pleasure, Loki did not tense, nor withdraw from the treatment. Rather, he fairly leaned into it, eyes fluttering closed again as the water ran over his face in small rivulets. 

And, to Thor’s near shock, he practically purred when Thor poured a generous amount of shampoo and began to work it into Loki’s curls at the scalp. 

By the time Thor had finished the wash, Loki was all but slumped against the side of the tub, not in exhaustion, as he had been, but in obvious contentment. 

This, coupled with the slightly healthier flush to his cheeks, now, did wonders to lighten the heavy weight in Thor’s stomach that had remained there stubbornly since Loki’s first cough the morning prior. 

“Good job, Loki.” Thor praised, cupping one hand at the side of Loki’s neck and smiling in pleasure at the dropped temperature of the skin there. “Well done.” 

If Loki heard the words, he did not react. Rather, he simply hummed distantly when Thor moved to help him out from the bath, fairly collapsing against Thor’s side and shivering slightly as he wrapped him in one of the thick towels from the rack beside the shower. 

It was only when they had successfully navigated their way out of the bathroom and back toward the beds that Thor faltered, his heart stuttering madly in his chest as he took in the rumpled sheets of Loki’s bed. 

Or, more accurately, the bloodstains standing out starkly against the otherwise pristinely white sheets, even in the dark of the room. 

After allowing himself another brief moment of hesitation, Thor made up his mind, and quickly crossed the room to deposit a still limp and pliant Loki onto his own bed, taking a moment to wrap the towel tighter around his brother’s shoulders before moving away to cross the room and rifle through their bags for Loki’s pajamas. 

“--ry” Loki’s faint whisper drew Thor up short, his hand just having closed around what he knew to be one of Loki’s favorite sweaters, and he turned to face his brother with a slightly furrowed brow. 

“Loki?” 

“I’m sorry.” Loki breathed, his gaze not on Thor, but remaining trained on the far wall, a visible tension beginning to take up residence beneath his shoulders, again. 

“So--” Thor cut himself off with a small shake of his head, and stood to cross the room once he’d quickly retrieved Loki’s flannel pajama bottoms from the pack--

Only to pause as the edge of his foot brushed the first aid kit where he’d hastily discarded it earlier that evening. 

Not allowing himself to hesitate, Thor reached for the kit, and drew out a roll of bandages and medical tape before hastily crossing the room to a still motionless Loki’s side. 

“No, Loki.” he murmured, kneeling at the side of the bed so that he could more easily find his brother’s wayward gaze. “Don’t.” 

“I’m sorry,” Loki repeated with a small shake of his head, his brow furrowing almost as if he were confused by Thor’s words. “About the meeting--” 

“Stop,” Thor commanded, his heart sinking sickeningly within his chest. 

“About--” Loki inhaled a small, tremulous breath. “About everything. I’m--I’m--” 

“ _Enough_ ,” Thor interrupted, allowing a bit of sterness to creep into his tone when he recognized the signs of Loki being well on his way to working himself back up, again. 

He allowed his voice to drop to soft murmur, however, when Loki’s eyes wide and watery eyes snapped to meet his. 

“You need not apologize, brother.” 

If possible, Loki’s frown only grew sharper, and he shook his head again. “But I--It was my--” he lurched forward to cough wetly for a moment, before straightening to continue determinedly, “It was my fault.” 

“It was not.” Thor ensured with a small, half smile of his own, and raised a hand to cup the side of Loki’s neck gently, feeling the pulse beating reedy and rapid beneath his thumb. “Please do not apologize.” 

Loki hesitated, his shoulders tensing tightly beneath Thor’s hand, before he deflated visibly and fell forward, his watery gaze locking with Thor’s as their foreheads nearly brushed. 

“You are--” he wheezed, quirking his mouth into a shadow of a smile, “Delusional.” 

“Hush,” Thor muttered, and leaned up to press a kiss to Loki’s (much cooler) forehead.

“Hmm,” Loki hummed, all but leaning into the touch with a contented look on his face. “Alright.” 

With a small huff of a laugh, Thor bestowed another brief kiss before he moved to help Loki into his sleep clothes and, after, gently guided him back onto the bed below. 

“Bedtime now, I think.” he whispered into the sudden silence. “If I can get you to agree with me that easily.” 

Loki simply hummed again, though his features creased a bit unhappily as Thor withdrew his touch. 

“Don’t--” he broke off to yawn and, subsequently, cough weakly into his elbow. “Don’t get used to it.” 

“I assure you,” Thor replied, squeezing his brother’s shoulder briefly before rising. “I won’t.”

At the movement, Loki’s eyes fluttered back open, and he eyed Thor questioningly. 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Thor reassured, pausing only to switch the lamp on to its lowest setting before climbing onto the side of the bed closest to the wall. 

When Thor had settled himself on his left side, turned to face Loki, a tremulous stillness had settled in the room, the only sounds each of their unsteady breaths as they mingled in the scant space between them. 

“I should probably--” Thor broke the fragile silence with a small grimace, and displayed the spool of bandages in his hand. 

If Loki’s expression shifted, Thor could not see it in the dark. Though, not a moment later, he extended one of his pale forearms wordlessly. 

Fighting not to react to the dark and gaping wounds that were still visible on the skin, Thor reached forward and began to unravel the bandages he held, making quick work of the first arm before moving to the other, when Loki offered it. 

Loki drew his arms back to cradle them against his chest the second Thor had tied off the final bandage, his gaze cool and detached even as he heaved audibly for breath. 

“There,” Thor breathed, reaching out without a second thought to run his hand gently through Loki’s still damp hair, his heart singing slightly when Loki did not move from beneath the touch. “You’re alright.” 

They sat like that, for a while, Thor still running one hand gently through Loki’s curls while his brother’s breaths slowly began to even out, still rattling and unsteady, but sounding much healthier now than they had even an hour before. 

Thor felt himself beginning to drop into a light doze, as well, the anxiety that had taken up residence between his ribs over 24 hours before finally easing into something more manageable--

Only for him to be torn roughly back into wakefulness when Loki made a small sound of discomfort, his previously sleep loosened shoulders tensing beneath Thor’s arm.

“Brother?” he whispered, his hand tightening slightly where it was still resting upon Loki’s neck. 

“I--” Loki’s breath hitched slightly, before he lurched forward to all but bury his face in the pillows beneath. “Thor--”

“Loki?” Thor inquired as he propped himself hastily onto one elbow, alarm beginning to quicken his pulse when Loki did not so much as shift in response. “What--” 

“--’o home.” Loki whispered, and Thor felt his heart sink as the meaning behind the words caught up with him, so childish in their fervor as they were he felt his heart tighten almost painfully. 

“I know,” he soothed, the hand on Loki’s neck moving down to stroke comfortingly at his arm. “We can go back as soon as you’re feeling better. Tomorrow, even, if--” 

“No!” Loki interrupted fervently, and Thor thought that he might have bolted upright, had he the energy. 

Rather, Loki simply burrowed further forward, his next words muffled by the bedclothes as if he were almost ashamed of them. 

“I want to go _home_.” he repeated, insistently, and Thor recognized a fraction of a second too late the meaning behind the words. “ _Home_ , Thor. Asgard and--and mother’s gardens. I want--I want--” 

“Shh,” Thor breathed, his heart hammering almost sickeningly as he reached out to curl both arms securely around Loki’s now heaving shoulders. “Hush. I know. I _know_.” 

He paused, then added, softly, “Me too.” 

“I--I--” Loki gasped weakly, shifting so that he could lay his head wearily onto Thor’s shoulder, the tip of his nose brushing his neck. 

And, to Thor’s almost dizzying mixture of joy and amazement, Loki’s arms tentatively rose to tighten around Thor’s waist not seconds later. 

“I know,” Thor repeated, if for nothing more than to fill the silence, and began to rub gently at Loki’s back in large, soothing circles. “I know. Hush, now.” 

“Will you--” Loki murmured, an incessantly tugging sleep already audibly slurring his words. “You won’t--” 

“I won’t leave.” Thor promised, tightening his grip and turning to bury his nose into the curls at the side of Loki’s head. “I swear it.” 

Seemingly satisfied, Loki burrowed slightly closer before falling limp, his breaths evening out not a moment later as he fell into what sounded like the most steady sleep he had had in days.

With a satisfied sigh of his own, Thor felt himself relax at the thought, and found that his own eye was already beginning to fall shut.

He hummed softly and, after tucking Loki slightly tighter into his side, allowed himself to succumb to the sleep beginning to tug at his consciousness. 

\---

To Thor’s mingled joy and relief, Loki did not awaken again until nearly noon the next day, his breathing having evened out and lost its unhealthy rattle almost entirely. 

His skin had grown cooler, as well. Not quite holding the slight chill it ordinarily did, but much closer to a semblance of health than Thor had felt in the past 24 hours. 

And, when he finally did awaken, Loki’s gaze was startlingly clearer than it had been when he’d fallen asleep the night before. The confusion, it seemed, was all but gone as he shifted so that he was sat upright on his elbows. 

“Loki?” Thor inquired from where he was still laid out on the other side of the bed, attempting to occupy himself with his phone, rather than sparing all his attention to simply listening to the sound of Loki’s blessedly even breathing. 

At the sound of his voice, Loki startled slightly, though he offered a small and somewhat sheepish smile when he turned to face Thor not a moment later. 

“So it would seem.” he croaked, voice still somewhat tight, though the flush on his cheeks looked much healthier, now. 

“How are you feeling?” Thor inquired, if for nothing more than to hear a verbal confirmation of Loki’s return to health. 

“Like I’ve gone a round with the Valkyrie in the sparring ring,” Loki answered honestly, and grimaced slightly as he raised a hand to rub slightly at the center of his chest. “That is to say, better than I did.” 

Thor quirked a smile at the words. “I’m glad.” he replied. 

A brief and somewhat awkward silence fell between them, then, and Thor fought not to begin babbling as Loki glanced away, gnawing at the inside of his cheek and seemingly deep in thought. 

“Do you want breakfast?” Thor inquired, at length, when it seemed that Loki was going to neither move nor speak again. 

Loki’s brow furrowed slightly, and his gaze flitted briefly back to Thor. 

“I think,” he began, slowly. “That I would like to go home.” 

In spite of himself, Thor felt his pulse stutter slightly at the words, though he noted with some relief that Loki’s gaze had remained clear and devoid of confusion. 

Or much emotion at all, for that matter. 

Already nodding in agreement, Thor offered an, “alright.”, to which Loki looked monumentally relieved. 

“I can look for the next available flight over.” Thor offered, gesturing to where his phone lay discarded on the bed, half hidden beneath the covers. “Do you feel up to--” 

“I can get us a seat.” Loki dismissed with a small wave of his hand. 

“Alright,” Thor agreed, again, if only to appease his still somewhat mildly frustrated looking brother. “Then--Do you--” 

“I’d like a shower, I think.” Loki interrupted, and turned so he could swing both legs over the side of the bed before Thor could so much as blink in response, his words clipped and held carefully controlled. 

“Oh,” Thor replied, one hand already reaching out to offer assistance when Loki rose unsteadily to his feet. “That’s--”

“ _‘Alright_?’” Loki cut in, the sudden mockery sharpening his tone so unexpected Thor nearly reeled back at the sound of it. 

“Fine.” Thor finished, a little lamely, the hand outstretched between them falling limply back to his side as Loki continued to glower. “That’s fine, Loki.” 

Abruptly, the tension in Loki’s frame ebbed somewhat, and something almost like guilt flickering behind his eyes before he schooled his features into a carefully blank mask.

“Alright,” he murmured softly and, before Thor could reply, turned on one heel to hastily retreat into the bathroom.

Leaving Thor to blow out a slow breath and fall forward, elbows resting on his knees as he fought to ignore the brief embers of vague disappointment he could feel beginning to smoulder to life deep within his chest. 

\---

Loki had, unsurprisingly (yet disappointing to Thor, all the same), remained stoically silent and detached from the minute he’d reemerged from the bathroom at the hotel, hair damp and skin tinged pink where he seemed to have practically scrubbed it clean. 

And Thor had allowed him this at least, forcing himself to remain little more than a silent support even as they had taken the taxi back to the airport, Loki remaining hunched beside him with his hands twisting restlessly in his lap, his gaze carefully averted. 

The flight back home had been easy enough to determine, and the ease with which Loki had conjured them a last minute set of tickets had been a testament to his quickly improving health.

Though, Thor would admit that he had expected a bit more delight on Loki’s part, at being presented the opportunity to commit blatant fraud. 

Rather, he had simply continued to follow Thor through the airport dismally and without a word. 

In fact, it wasn’t until they had settled into their seats aboard the plane that Loki finally spoke again. 

“I’m sorry.” he murmured, biting restlessly at the edge of his thumbnail and keeping his gaze cast pointedly out the small window to his left, when Thor turned to face him at the words. 

“Stop that,” Thor commanded, raising a hand to bat gently at Loki’s hand and effectively dislodging it from where he was beginning to bite the thumbnail raw. 

When Loki did not react a small, displeased frown, however, Thor sighed and wilted somewhat in his seat. 

“Loki,” he chided with a small, weary sigh. “I told you--”

“I know,” Loki interrupted and, when he finally did turn to face Thor, his features were drawn, his brow furrowed and his eyes pleading. “I just--You don’t--” he coughed drily, once. “didn’t--deserve any of…” 

He trailed off and, had Thor not been watching as closely as he was, he would have missed the way Loki’s eyes flitted briefly down to his wrists.

His wrists, and where the thick sleeves of his sweater tugged nearly to his pale knuckles.

“Oh, Loki,” Thor breathed, again, and reached out to grasp one of Loki’s hands gently beneath his own, noting with a small frown the slight tremor of the limb, and the way his brother stilled slightly at the contact. “I’m not upset. I never was.” 

And, when a brief, watery sheen coated Loki’s eyes, still locked desperately with Thor’s own, Thor offered a small smile and a squeeze of his hand. 

“You don’t need to be sorry.”

Loki blinked, and one singular tear made its way down his face before he hastily raised the hand not currently clutched within Thor’s own to wipe at it irritably. 

“How can you say that?” he snapped, though there was nothing but misery etched into his features when he glanced up at Thor, again. “After--After everything?” 

“Because it’s true.” Thor replied simply, reaching forward to wrap his free hand warmly around the back of Loki’s (blessedly cool) neck, and leaning forward to rest their foreheads briefly together. “I will always look after you, Loki.” 

Loki inhaled an unsteady breath, and bit his lip roughly before squeezing his eyes closed and pressing slightly closer.

A brief silence fell over the two of them, then, though even as Thor drew away, he did not release his grip on Loki’s hand. 

Nor did Loki make any effort to dislodge it. 

Therefore, it was only when the plane had begun to taxi down the runway, readying itself for takeoff, that Thor spoke again. 

“Though,” he murmured lowly, as not to startle Loki where he was beginning to waver slightly beside him. 

“Hm?” Loki inquired, turning to raise one brow curiously in Thor’s direction. 

“We--” Thor paused, his stomach turning slightly as he moved his hand slowly from Loki’s to rest it atop his wrist. 

And, after pausing another moment, pushed gently at the sleeve of the thickly woolen sweater there to reveal the very edge of the stark white bandages hidden beneath. 

(Loki must have removed and reapplied them himself that morning, Thor realized distantly, though he was slightly unsure of what to make of the revelation). 

“We do need to talk about this.” Thor continued on a low murmur, his thumb already beginning to run soothingly over the protruding nub of bone at the joint of Loki’s wrist. “At some point.”

It seemed for a moment that Loki was going to protest, something like indigance flickering over his features as he tensed beneath Thor’s hand. 

Instead, he simply deflated slightly, his gaze falling away as he began to gnaw visibly at the inside of his cheek, as if carefully considering Thor’s words. 

The silence between them was filled by the sudden roaring of the plane’s engine, signifying an imminent takeoff, and Thor opened his mouth to prod his brother again before all attempts at conversation were lost beneath the noise. 

Only for Loki to turn to face him again, the bit of moisture beginning to glimmer at the corner of his eyes making Thor’s heart twist. 

“Later?” he pleaded, bottom lip quivering almost imperceptibly. “I promise, I won’t--just--later?”

The plane began to pick up speed, then, the roar of the turbines nearly deafening, though Thor’s attention remained focussed solely on Loki. 

And, he considered distantly, when had he ever been capable of denying his brother anything?

“Alright,” he agreed with a small, slow nod, knowing that the decision had been the correct one when Loki nearly wilted in relief, his eyes fluttering again in exhaustion. “Just--later.” 

Loki nodded once in agreement, a small and strained smile creasing his features, before his lids shut fully and he exhaled a long and weary breath. 

As their plane took to the sky, quickly gaining altitude, Thor watched as Loki tilted dangerously forward, and his stomach warmed in a comfortable and familiar affection. 

“Come here,” he murmured, reaching out with one hand to cup the far side of Loki’s neck and, when the latter did not protest, urged his brother sideways so that his head was pillowed comfortably against Thor’s shoulder. 

Within minutes, Loki was asleep again, his breaths warm and even against the side of Thor’s neck as he fell limp against his side. 

And, in spite of everything, Thor felt himself smiling softly at the contact, and turned to place a gentle kiss into Loki’s curls before he rested the side of his own head atop his brother’s and allowed his eye to fall shut. 

There would be things to discuss in the future, he knew. Potentially even as soon as the moment they made it safely back to New Asgard. 

For now, however, they were safe. Loki was healthy (or healthier, at any rate), and resting comfortably for the first time since they had left Norway. 

It was enough, Thor considered, for now. 

Loki was safe, and it was enough. 

**Author's Note:**

> i hate the airport!!! so much!!!! literal sensory hell  
> (yes this was a blatant self projection over my being trapped in the airport in the middle of nowhere and ultimately missing my connecting flight last week. hooray)
> 
> as stated previously, i am running a bit behind on the next 'never doubt;' update, which may be out as late as tuesday evening. i'm so sorry in advance if this is the case, but i hope this was a good gap-filler, for the time being! 
> 
> as always, thank you so so much to everyone who has read/enjoyed and taken the time to leave such lovely comments on my fics! the real MVPs.  
> (as always, hmu at my [tumblr](http://littlekinng.tumblr.com) if you want) 


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